Rule 2 - The Breakfast Ball
There is no shot in recreational golf more sacred, or more abused, than the breakfast ball. The Crew has therefore codified when a second first-tee shot is a mercy and when it is simply fraud. Rule 2 follows, verbatim and non-negotiable.
The Rule (reproduced verbatim from the Dad Golf Handbook)
Purpose of Rule: governs the sacred second first tee shot.
2.1 Every player is entitled to one (1) Breakfast Ball on the first tee. This shot does not exist. It never happened. No witnesses saw it.
2.1a The Breakfast Ball must be declared BEFORE the second ball is teed. Silently re-teeing and hoping is not a Breakfast Ball. It is fraud.
2.1b If the first ball was actually good, a player may NOT retroactively declare it the Breakfast Ball after topping the second one. Both balls are now in play and the player must take the worse of the two. This is called Justice.
2.2 Breakfast Balls expire at the first tee. A "lunch ball" on the 10th is not a recognized instrument and shall be laughed at.
2.3 A player whose Breakfast Ball goes further out of bounds than the original shot must play the original, and must also hear about it.
PENALTY FOR EXCEEDING THE BREAKFAST BALL ALLOWANCE: the extra shots count, the Crew counts them out loud, one beer.
Official Ruling 2.1b/1: Ken hit his opening drive down the middle, declared "eh, I can do better," re-teed, and duck-hooked the second into a yard with a dog in it. The Committee rules the second ball in play under 2.1b. The dog kept the ball. Ken kept the memory.
Declare it early, declare it out loud, and never try to promote a good drive into a breakfast ball after topping the retee. That way lies Justice.